I have a theory about why boys and girls don't get along sometimes. It is relatively complicated and relatively simple all at once. Girls are consistently fighting against excess while boys are consistently fighting against deficiency. We're on completely opposite ends of the spectrum. Allow me to explain:
Let's think about it. As a girl I can probably elaborate more on the female side of things so here we go. Girls are in this constant battle with being "too much". Don't weigh too much, don't be too smart, don't be too independent, don't be too strong. We're too emotional and we talk too much.
We want more but are told to be less.
"She's just too much woman for anyone to handle." Society tells us not to have too big of a personality and don't make too much money. Relationships end on our side of things because we nagged too much, we wanted too much. It's all about excess here. We have to make ourselves smaller, more dainty, more fragile. Anything in excess is counted against us. She has three drinks and she's wasted. She eats an appetizer, entree, and dessert so she's a beast. She has five boyfriends in college. That's five boyfriends in four years! Someone gets around...see where I'm going here? I could go on and bore you. But we are in an uphill battle against more while our counterparts seem to struggle elsewhere.
Guys are in a constant struggle against not being "enough".
There is a fight against deficiency. He doesn't weigh enough, doesn't bench enough, isn't fast enough, strong enough, manly enough. Be more of a man. "He's just not man enough- man up." Drink more than anyone in the bar. Eat more than all your friends. Make more money. Yes, certainly make more money, that will be the key to fighting off your deficiency. Relationships end on their side of things because they didn't care enough, didn't talk enough, didn't spend enough time with us. He's not a man because he hasn't made enough sexual conquests. Sleep with more women. Those four girlfriends in college kept him from more that was out there. He's not enough to be held up to the man standard.
We're fighting two extremes and it's hard to meet in the middle.
But it makes me wonder what these opposing battles say about our views of God? As a woman it is easier to see Christ as a nurturing and gentle figure. We have no problem picturing ourselves as the Bride of Christ because often we want to be an earthly bride with all our hearts. Jesus is soft, caring, and warm for girls.
But it seems that guys have a harder time with that image. They want a God who is strong, powerful, and mighty. They like when God gets all Old Testament on the people and whips them into shape. They're drawn to the Israelites destroying cities and taking names. It's like an ancient walking dead situation maybe. Guys want the Jesus who flips tables and comes riding in on a cloud of fire, not the one who stood silently and got beat to death. And to be honest girls don't really want to think about God striking people dead.
It's complicated but beautiful. I find no coincidence in our differences.
I find no coincidence in a God who is big enough to encompass both our extremes. It seems to me that despite our struggles we were obviously made for each other. The guys are there to teach us that it is okay to be more. It's okay to be big sometimes. And the girls are there to show the men that they are indeed enough. Somehow we fit.
We were made to help expand each other's pictures of Christ.
Women were made to point the men towards a gentle and humble God. The men were made to point the women towards a God who is bigger, better, and stronger. Sure, we might not always get along. I'll always fight against my excess and guys will fight against deficiency. And I think that sometimes makes us fight with each other. But there will be moments when we meet halfway and that's when I think maybe, just maybe, we'll all get to know ourselves and Christ just a little better.